When I was eleven years old I met a boy. Within minutes of meeting him I turned to my mom and said “mom, that is the boy I am going to marry”. Ten years later I did in fact marry that boy. We started dating when I was fifteen and married seven years later.
Each week I see, hear and feel the “billboards” that sort of direct me to what’s important for me to soak up. This week, the overwhelming theme was gratitude. I have been reflecting on what I am grateful for all week long. My list is enormous; some big things, some littler things but no less important. I am grateful for my beautiful son. I am grateful for his love, his appetite for life, for his energy. I am grateful for my nutty dogs. I am grateful for my family. I have a mom and second dad who answer my ten phone calls a day no matter how neurotic I may be behaving that particular day. I have a dad and a second mom who always have time for that one hour phone call when their grandson is feeling chatty. I have the most incredible in-laws who stand in act as my very own on a daily basis and always have time to share a cup of tea. And, let’s not forget my brother. He reminds me daily of where I come from, where I am and where I will be. He is my vault. Finally, I have the greatest friends ever. Friends my past, as far back as the second grade, are in my life each day (a positive that comes from the Facebook world). And I have friends from around the country that have come and gone through each move and season of my life. And, I have friends close by, old and new that that cause my cup to runneth over.
However, this week and in this life, my undying gratitude is directed to the one person, who for the past 24 years has been a solid force in my life, heart, soul and head. This week I have been singing my gratitude, praises and thanks to God, the universe and angels for my husband. This man stood by me through my crazy, irrational teenage years. He held my hand and built me up through each college exam. He stood next to me and promised “for better or for worse” and he meant it as he has seen the worst in me and he is still here! He stood in the background when my career was catapulting forward and then took the lead when my health crashed. He spent a month sleeping by my side in the hospital as we waited, fearful, for our son to arrive despite the cancer that threatened our lives. He changed diapers when I was so sleep deprived that I couldn’t move and he does math homework when our son’s story problems are way out of my league! He is everything to us, my son and me. He leads us, he guides us, he supports us, he builds us up, he cares for us, he teaches us and he fights for us each and every day. This week I have been reflecting on our life together and the gratitude in my heart is bursting out of me.
Recently we have experienced further health scares with me. We hit the tip of the iceberg while on vacation a couple of weeks ago. Through the crisis, this man led us. He led us with strong arms and despite his own fears for his wife, he brought us through. He cared for me, he cared for our son. While we were skiing down the mountain he was the rock. He guided our son who raced past us and he guided me who was always trailing behind. Again, he led us with strong arms. Back home we had to deal with the medical crud. When I woke up from my procedure I was looking into his eyes and saw everything I ever needed to know. In those seconds, I could see, feel and hear how much he loved and cared for me. I could see and hear his heart and I knew that no matter what this life meant for me our son would be cared for by this man with every ounce of his energy and life force. Through his eyes I could feel the full force and depth of his devotion to our family. His eyes pierced through my very core and his pure heart put me to complete ease and peace.
I am grateful beyond words. Truly, there are no words strong enough to convey my gratitude, love, and pure depth of emotion that I feel for this man. As I was listening to the radio, a song by Sactus Real called Lead Me was playing… it was a song about a man who wanted to do right by his family and he is praying to God to guide him. As I was feeling the words, I could only see my husband. This man of strength and faith and love who … never leaves us hungry for love, guides us with strong hands, leads us to chase our dreams, he stands up when we can’t, he shows us he’s willing to fight, he never leaves us feeling alone and he shows us each day that we are the loves of his life.
I am grateful for this life and for this one true love that I have been given and for this man who loves us with his whole heart and soul.
With Love and Thanks,